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| Martin1956 |  | Today | 14-02-2008 @ 17:54 |
 Old Age Presser Member 75, 7745 posts SQ 0, BP 200, DL 200400.0 kgs @ 105kgs Eq | > Frank was excited about his new rifle and decided to try > bear hunting. > He travelled up to Alaska, spotted a small brown bear and > shot it. > Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned > around to see a big black bear. > The black bear said, 'That was a very bad mistake. That was > my cousin. I'm going to give you two choices. Either I maul > you to death or we have sex.' > After considering briefly, Frank decided to accept the latter > alternative. So the black bear had his way with Frank. > Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Frank soon recovered > and vowed revenge. > He headed out on another trip to Alaska where he found the > black bear and shot it dead. Right after, there was another > tap on his shoulder. > This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him. > The grizzly said, 'That was a big mistake, Frank. That was > my cousin and you've got two choices: Either I maul you to > death or we have 'rough sex.' > Again, Frank thought it was better to cooperate with the > grizzly bear than be mauled to death. So the grizzly had > his way with Frank. > Although he survived, it took several months before Frank > fully recovered. > Now Frank was completely outraged, so he headed back to Alaska > and managed to track down the grizzly bear and shot it. > He felt sweet revenge, but then, moments later, there was a > tap on is shoulder. He turned around to find a giant polar > bear standing there. > The polar bear looked at him and said, 'Admit it Frank, you > don't come here for the hunting, do you?' Awaits the 'I don't get its'.  | ||
| Tannhauser | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 17:59 |
 fighting woo with woo Member 206, 1491 posts SQ 227.5, BP 165, DL 260652.5 kgs @ 100kgs UnEq | So, at no stage did Frank register surprise at being confronted by a succession of talking bears? Or is it an allegory? | ||
| little_a | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 18:29 |
 still a devious weightlifting bastard Member 43, 14374 posts | & why were all the different species of bears so closely related? Family of inbreds no doubt. Were they originally from Scotland like the Sawney Bean clan? I dont get it | ||
| Tannhauser | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 18:44 |
fighting woo with woo Member 206, 1491 posts SQ 227.5, BP 165, DL 260652.5 kgs @ 100kgs UnEq | Also, and maybe I'm being too literal here, you would think that he would have sought assistance from a plumber for those taps on his shoulder. | ||
| Martin1956 | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 18:45 |
Old Age Presser Member 75, 7745 posts SQ 0, BP 200, DL 200400.0 kgs @ 105kgs Eq | Tannhauser said: Also, and maybe I'm being too literal here, you would think that he would have sought assistance from a plumber for those taps on his shoulder. In Alaska they would be fawcetts. 15-all!  | ||
| Tannhauser | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 18:52 |
fighting woo with woo Member 206, 1491 posts SQ 227.5, BP 165, DL 260652.5 kgs @ 100kgs UnEq | Faucet? Or Farrah Fawcett? Incidentally, I was distressed to learn - and this is true - that she has cancer of the anus. | ||
| little_a | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 18:59 |
still a devious weightlifting bastard Member 43, 14374 posts | From bears to Farrah? You guys dont know how to keep a thread objective and on subject Bad news about the angel. | ||
| Fatpete | | ... | 14-02-2008 @ 21:07 |
 Hyper obese Pete Member 70, 17900 posts SQ 322.5, BP 205, DL 300827.5 kgs @ 133kgs Eq | little_a said: Bad news about the angel. The angel who can't have an angel ? | ||
| jimblanchflower | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 09:28 |
Teabagger for hire Member 54, 237 posts | This posting shows a lack of sensitivity. Did no-one stop to think about the trauma this could cause to anyone who has been anally raped by a talking bear? No! It's not so funny when you think about it, is it? I just hope that none of those guys I shared a cell with in prison are reading this. | ||
| Martin1956 | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 09:32 |
Old Age Presser Member 75, 7745 posts SQ 0, BP 200, DL 200400.0 kgs @ 105kgs Eq | But anal sex is never mentioned. Frank could have been a hermaphrodite. Which, of course, would bring a (w)hole new meaning to the expression 'to be frank'... | ||
| jimblanchflower | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 09:52 |
Teabagger for hire Member 54, 237 posts | Martin1956 said: But anal sex is never mentioned. Frank could have been a hermaphrodite. Which, of course, would bring a (w)hole new meaning to the expression 'to be frank'... I do apologise - this clearly makes it OK - so come on ye girls, comne on ye boys and come on ye trannies - come slide down the greasy pole of my depravity. | ||
| little_a | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 10:04 |
still a devious weightlifting bastard Member 43, 14374 posts | jimblanchflower said: I just hope that none of those guys I shared a cell with in prison are reading this. I dont get it. Were you in prison for raping bears Jim? | ||
| Martin1956 | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 10:07 |
Old Age Presser Member 75, 7745 posts SQ 0, BP 200, DL 200400.0 kgs @ 105kgs Eq | Oh I'm not saying it's ok, just a bit less painful! I mean, they weren't even married. How can that possibly be defended? And the hurt could have been because the bears never got in touch after the initial encounter... Will you be bringing your greasy pole of depravity with you tomorrow, Jim, or is that an after dark thing? | ||
| jimblanchflower | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 11:39 |
Teabagger for hire Member 54, 237 posts | little_a said: jimblanchflower said: I just hope that none of those guys I shared a cell with in prison are reading this. I dont get it. Were you in prison for raping bears Jim? Nothing was ever proved | ||
| Martin1956 | | ... | 15-02-2008 @ 12:14 |
Old Age Presser Member 75, 7745 posts SQ 0, BP 200, DL 200400.0 kgs @ 105kgs Eq | Presumably no one was prepared to bear witness against you? | ||