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Stupid stuff for mass shakes - ideas wanted!

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Funky_monkeyIconStupid stuff for mass shakes - ideas wanted!13-07-2020 @ 19:53 
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Member 160, 5121 posts
SQ 190, BP 137.5, DL 225
552.5 kgs @ 86kgs UnEq		Right, my bootleg weight gain shake given to me via a corrupt member of my family who works in customs is coming to an end, and 2 weeks wages for a quality mass powder is silly. Protein powder is also silly money. Oats are imported, so again, silly.

I have an almost unlimited supply of olive oil (got 40 litres from 3 trees last year) and 5 almond trees at my disposal. A blender is definitely affordable so almonds won't be an issue. Semolina/normal flour for a weight gain shake? Bread and pasta don't give me gut issues at all.
150g semolina
500ml lactose free milk
50g almonds
30ml olive oil

Thuoughts/suggestions for outside the box ideas?
BoarIcon...13-07-2020 @ 20:23 
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Nothing left in the tank.
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almonds grow on trees ??!
jtIcon...13-07-2020 @ 20:35 
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old age traveller
Member 332, 8041 posts
Rice pudding.
uzaladIcon...13-07-2020 @ 21:51 
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not hilarious
Member 1977, 159 posts
SQ 150, BP 1, DL 215
366.0 kgs @ 77kgs UnEq		Are you struggling to maintain or gain weight with "real" food? Pasta tends to go down easy with tomato sauce, sprinkle olive oil, almonds and dried fruit on it?
Funky_monkeyIcon...14-07-2020 @ 09:29 
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uzalad said:Are you struggling to maintain or gain weight with "real" food? Pasta tends to go down easy with tomato sauce, sprinkle olive oil, almonds and dried fruit on it?


My gran cooks most of the food in the house and interferes whenever I try to cook as if she hasn't seen it done in a village with 900 people, it's wrong. Blind baking pastry for a quiche is hard to explain to an 89 year old with no wish to learn anything new.

A monster kebab is the same as buying one lamb chop, but having kebabs every day is gonna end badly.

Dinner could very well be pasta with tomato, onions, halloumi. It could also be almost exclusively veg from the garden, with next to no macronutrients. I think i'll be adding shots of olive oil and almonds all over the place.
Funky_monkeyIcon...14-07-2020 @ 09:30 
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Member 160, 5121 posts
SQ 190, BP 137.5, DL 225
552.5 kgs @ 86kgs UnEq
Boar said:almonds grow on trees ??!


Where else would they grow? Brazil nuts, cashews, I think ALL nuts grow on trees. Peanuts aren't nuts.
HamIcon...14-07-2020 @ 13:08 
Ham but hey
Member 4787, 205 posts
Can you get hold of diary ok? I use milk, Skyr yoghurt, eggs, honey, banana and salt for the most part. I add protein powder too but as you said that is out then the Skyr is very protein dense so could cover your needs. Biotiful Kefir is also very good for protein..
lukiIcon...14-07-2020 @ 14:25 
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526.0 kgs @ 110kgs UnEq		Did you ever try keto coffee? Olive oil and greek/turkish coffee. Almond butter and whey blended with fruit is nice for a more traditional shake. Peeling or cooking the fruit makes it less oddly textured. I like mashooka eggs which is olive oil, harrisa paste, tomatoes and poached eggs with fresh herbs and oil. You can add any wilted green or pulses too. I used to make a pot of it monday and poach eggs for a day or two after.
Funky_monkeyIcon...14-07-2020 @ 15:52 
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Ham said:Can you get hold of diary ok? I use milk, Skyr yoghurt, eggs, honey, banana and salt for the most part. I add protein powder too but as you said that is out then the Skyr is very protein dense so could cover your needs. Biotiful Kefir is also very good for protein..


I have an unlimited supply of halloumi, but Skyr is something that probably has never been sold EVER in north Cyprus.
Funky_monkeyIcon...14-07-2020 @ 15:55 
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Member 160, 5121 posts
SQ 190, BP 137.5, DL 225
552.5 kgs @ 86kgs UnEq
luki said:Did you ever try keto coffee? Olive oil and greek/turkish coffee. Almond butter and whey blended with fruit is nice for a more traditional shake. Peeling or cooking the fruit makes it less oddly textured. I like mashooka eggs which is olive oil, harrisa paste, tomatoes and poached eggs with fresh herbs and oil. You can add any wilted green or pulses too. I used to make a pot of it monday and poach eggs for a day or two after.


I often make eggs in the style you mentioned. Eggs (got too many, own chickens) fresh herbs, tomatoes/peppers/onions. All home grown. IF there is any spinach growing about wild in the garden, I add some of that too. Whey is stupid expensive here. 400 lira for 2.2lbs and I'm left with 1,600 or so each month to live off. I'm essentially a peasant now with limited choices even if i did have the money.
SparrowIcon...14-07-2020 @ 22:13 
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always lookIng for the extra UT2 work.
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Funky_monkey said:
My gran cooks most of the food in the house and interferes whenever I try to cook as if she hasn't seen it done in a village with 900 people, it's wrong. Blind baking pastry for a quiche is hard to explain to an 89 year old with no wish to learn anything new.
A monster kebab is the same as buying one lamb chop, but having kebabs every day is gonna end badly.
Dinner could very well be pasta with tomato, onions, halloumi. It could also be almost exclusively veg from the garden, with next to no macronutrients. I think i'll be adding shots of olive oil and almonds all over the place.


It would have to be the monster kebab every day for me.
SamthepigmanIcon...15-07-2020 @ 20:44 
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See You Next Tuesday
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Sparrow said:
It would have to be the monster kebab every day for me.
SparrowIcon...15-07-2020 @ 22:21 
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always lookIng for the extra UT2 work.
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HamIcon...16-07-2020 @ 07:30 
Ham but hey
Member 4787, 205 posts
Butter milk is also a winner in my book, I wonder how universal that stuff is?
BillytheoldIcon...16-07-2020 @ 18:29 
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Sugdens crazy old person.
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Ham said:Butter milk is also a winner in my book, I wonder how universal that stuff is?


Buttermilk is mostly unknown in The USA nowadays! Can’t you just throw a line out in the water?

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