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CAJIconDepression/OCD10-08-2017 @ 21:04 
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Post Edited: 10.08.2017 @ 21:48 PM by CAJ
http://imgur.com/XwpkJDh.png

Ok so some of you will be aware of the recent posts I've made in the Anxiety thread.

I've had cause to do a lot of thinking about WHY I feel the way I do and why some people seem to be able to cope well with these situations and others such as myself just occasionally lose their s**t.

I have determined through a few days of research that my behaviour is very characteristic of someone with OCD tendencies, fortunately not the physical manifestation that most people associate OCD with but certainly mentally with regards to my thought processes.

Occasionally I do little things which are 'OCD like' but not anywhere near as severe as some people, common things for me, no matter how daft it sounds are like when you go into a supermarket and you get the piles of baskets, I'll change my mind last minute when going to grab one and I'll get one off a different pile because I think if I went for the one I was going for originally something bad may happen... or if I'm walking and I have to go around a barrier such as a lamppost I'll change my mind again last minute as to which side I go around it on for the same reason. So I know there is an element no matter how small of OCD.

I also remember having OCD tendencies a lot growing up, a somewhat comical one for me which I don't mind sharing for the loals was when I first learnt to 'pump the stump' as a young boy, occasionally images of this hideously fat lass from my school would pop into my head invading my thoughts and every time it happened I had to stop and punch the wall 10 times before continuing. Think I may have been a bit f**ked up back then lol.

Anyway..

I wouldn't class myself as 'depressed' as such, however what I now understand to be recent 'Limerent' behaviour has made me do a lot of research and it is on the same wavelength as OCD. It is thought that both are characterised by low serotonin levels in the brain.

The Doc was keen to get me on antidepressants but I really want to limit the amount I play with my brain chemicals. I have witnessed first hand how a variety of different drugs have affected previous girlfriends, the last one was on fluoxetine and then citalopram and that changed her completely, it was a large factor in the breakdown of our relationship because whilst the crippling depression did subside she became so emotionally distant and 'numb', not to mention it completely trashed her libido which did us no favours either.

A mate of mine is in Sertraline and he says it is helping but he hasn't really been on it long enough to learn how it will effect him long term.

After a bit of research I have tonight ordered some Inositol and Choline Bitartrate from Myprotein which many are claiming boosts serotonin activity and promotes general well being, I'm not saying it sounds like a solution for someone with crippling depression however if all I need is a serotonin boost to stop feeling the way I am then for £15 its gotta be worth a shot?

Anyone care to contribute?
AdamTIcon...10-08-2017 @ 21:14 
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My brother suffers heavy depression and anxiety. He can't work and it will most likely be the case for the rest of his life.

I suffer anxiety and worry a lot. Or least I used to worry big time. I have a young son with autism and my Father nearly died a few months back with blood poisoning.

Having these major issues, has helped me sit back and look at what's important in life. I know I will always suffer anxiety, but talking and using your mind are great things.

I will try and stay away from medication, but If it's needed, then one should definitely take it.

Life really is short and we all have to make the best of it. Everyone has dark times, but everyone has the potential to get through them.

I hope you get yourself sorted mate. You seem a funny guy on here. Go and enjoy yourself and do things that make you active and happy.
scruffmcbuffIcon...10-08-2017 @ 21:17 
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CAJ said:Ok so some of you will be aware of the recent posts I've made in the Anxiety thread.

I've had cause to do a lot of thinking about WHY I feel the way I do and why some people seem to be able to cope well with these situations and others such as myself just occasionally lose their s**t.

I have determined through a few days of research that my behaviour is very characteristic of someone with OCD tendencies, fortunately not the physical manifestation that most people associate OCD with but certainly mentally with regards to my thought processes.

Occasionally I do little things which are 'OCD like' but not anywhere near as severe as some people, common things for me, no matter how daft it sounds are like when you go into a supermarket and you get the piles of baskets, I'll change my mind last minute when going to grab one and I'll get one off a different pile because I think if I went for the one I was going for originally something bad may happen... or if I'm walking and I have to go around a barrier such as a lamppost I'll change my mind again last minute as to which side I go around it on for the same reason. So I know there is an element no matter how small of OCD.

I also remember having OCD tendencies a lot growing up, a somewhat comical one for me which I don't mind sharing for the loals was when I first learnt to 'pump the stump' as a young boy, occasionally images of this hideously fat lass from my school would pop into my head invading my thoughts and every time it happened I had to stop and punch the wall 10 times before continuing. Think I may have been a bit f**ked up back then lol.

Anyway..

I wouldn't class myself as 'depressed' as such, however what I now understand to be recent 'Limerent' behaviour has made me do a lot of research and it is on the same wavelength as OCD. It is thought that both are characterised by low serotonin levels in the brain.

The Doc was keen to get me on antidepressants but I really want to limit the amount I play with my brain chemicals. I have witnessed first hand how a variety of different drugs have affected previous girlfriends, the last one was on fluoxetine and then citalopram and that changed her completely, it was a large factor in the breakdown of our relationship because whilst the crippling depression did subside she became so emotionally distant and 'numb', not to mention it completely trashed her libido which did us no favours either.

A mate of mine is in Sertraline and he says it is helping but he hasn't really been on it long enough to learn how it will effect him long term.

After a bit of research I have tonight ordered some Inositol and Choline Bitartrate from Myprotein which many are claiming boosts serotonin activity and promotes general well being, I'm not saying it sounds like a solution for someone with crippling depression however if all I need is a serotonin boost to stop feeling the way I am then for £15 its gotta be worth a shot?

Anyone care to contribute?



It sounds likely bro. I too have many times considered myself to be slightly OCD in the way my anxiety effects me.

And on Sertraline... f**k sertraline. Dont put yourself thru that s**t.
CAJIcon...10-08-2017 @ 21:49 
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AdamT said:My brother suffers heavy depression and anxiety. He can't work and it will most likely be the case for the rest of his life.

I suffer anxiety and worry a lot. Or least I used to worry big time. I have a young son with autism and my Father nearly died a few months back with blood poisoning.

Having these major issues, has helped me sit back and look at what's important in life. I know I will always suffer anxiety, but talking and using your mind are great things.

I will try and stay away from medication, but If it's needed, then one should definitely take it.

Life really is short and we all have to make the best of it. Everyone has dark times, but everyone has the potential to get through them.

I hope you get yourself sorted mate. You seem a funny guy on here. Go and enjoy yourself and do things that make you active and happy.


Thankyou mate, same sentiments to you, life ain't easy sometimes
CAJIcon...10-08-2017 @ 21:50 
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scruffmcbuff said:
It sounds likely bro. I too have many times considered myself to be slightly OCD in the way my anxiety effects me.
And on Sertraline... f**k sertraline. Dont put yourself thru that s**t.


I shall heed your warning mate, heard to many horror stories already! Unhappy
WiegieboardIcon...10-08-2017 @ 22:37 
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Post Edited: 10.08.2017 @ 22:38 PM by Wiegieboard
CAJ said:http://imgur.com/XwpkJDh.png

Ok so some of you will be aware of the recent posts I've made in the Anxiety thread.

I've had cause to do a lot of thinking about WHY I feel the way I do and why some people seem to be able to cope well with these situations and others such as myself just occasionally lose their s**t.

I have determined through a few days of research that my behaviour is very characteristic of someone with OCD tendencies, fortunately not the physical manifestation that most people associate OCD with but certainly mentally with regards to my thought processes.

Occasionally I do little things which are 'OCD like' but not anywhere near as severe as some people, common things for me, no matter how daft it sounds are like when you go into a supermarket and you get the piles of baskets, I'll change my mind last minute when going to grab one and I'll get one off a different pile because I think if I went for the one I was going for originally something bad may happen... or if I'm walking and I have to go around a barrier such as a lamppost I'll change my mind again last minute as to which side I go around it on for the same reason. So I know there is an element no matter how small of OCD.

I also remember having OCD tendencies a lot growing up, a somewhat comical one for me which I don't mind sharing for the loals was when I first learnt to 'pump the stump' as a young boy, occasionally images of this hideously fat lass from my school would pop into my head invading my thoughts and every time it happened I had to stop and punch the wall 10 times before continuing. Think I may have been a bit f**ked up back then lol.

Anyway..

I wouldn't class myself as 'depressed' as such, however what I now understand to be recent 'Limerent' behaviour has made me do a lot of research and it is on the same wavelength as OCD. It is thought that both are characterised by low serotonin levels in the brain.

The Doc was keen to get me on antidepressants but I really want to limit the amount I play with my brain chemicals. I have witnessed first hand how a variety of different drugs have affected previous girlfriends, the last one was on fluoxetine and then citalopram and that changed her completely, it was a large factor in the breakdown of our relationship because whilst the crippling depression did subside she became so emotionally distant and 'numb', not to mention it completely trashed her libido which did us no favours either.

A mate of mine is in Sertraline and he says it is helping but he hasn't really been on it long enough to learn how it will effect him long term.

After a bit of research I have tonight ordered some Inositol and Choline Bitartrate from Myprotein which many are claiming boosts serotonin activity and promotes general well being, I'm not saying it sounds like a solution for someone with crippling depression however if all I need is a serotonin boost to stop feeling the way I am then for £15 its gotta be worth a shot?

Anyone care to contribute?


Sertraline after a few weeks is awesome. Makes me 100% less violent. Takes a while to kick in. I'm on a low low dose of it but it works wonders. If I try to come off it I get hyper competetive, aggressive and very impatient.

However, these chemicals affect different people in sometimes very different ways.
CAJIcon...10-08-2017 @ 22:51 
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Wiegieboard said:
Sertraline after a few weeks is awesome. Makes me 100% less violent. Takes a while to kick in. I'm on a low low dose of it but it works wonders. If I try to come off it I get hyper competetive, aggressive and very impatient.
However, these chemicals affect different people in sometimes very different ways.


Thats quite contradictory to what I've heard but as you say they work differently for different people. I can't believe with so many different ones available affecting the same mechanism of serotonin reuptake inhibition, we don't know more about them. The descriptions for these drugs literally state 'not much is known about how this drug works'. I know my first bird went through 3 before she found one that suited her and didn't change her personality in a negative way.

Really glad yours is working for you though mate, thats good to hear Happy
slimsimIcon...10-08-2017 @ 22:55 
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Wiegieboard said:
However, these chemicals affect different people in sometimes very different ways.


I'm sure they do but the important thing to do is try them!

I'm diabetic and nobody, or at least nobody with any sense, would suggest I try and muster on without my insulin.

By the same token CAJ I don't think you should try and get by trying to be heroic without meds if you could feel 1000X better with them.

A mental illness is still an illness and shouldn't be diminished in any way, shape or form, simply because it isn't physical. The doctor wanted you on meds for a reason, because with all their years of education, training and experience they feel like meds will make you feel better.
CAJIcon...10-08-2017 @ 23:07 
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slimsim said:
I'm sure they do but the important thing to do is try them!
I'm diabetic and nobody, or at least nobody with any sense, would suggest I try and muster on without my insulin.
By the same token CAJ I don't think you should try and get by trying to be heroic without meds if you could feel 1000X better with them.
A mental illness is still an illness and shouldn't be diminished in any way, shape or form, simply because it isn't physical. The doctor wanted you on meds for a reason, because with all their years of education, training and experience they feel like meds will make you feel better.


Of course they wouldn't mate but thats a matter of life and death, this isn't as critical as that.

Issue is mate I'm not 'depressed', I don't cry myself to sleep on a night and struggle with motivation, yes I've been rough recently but thats the anxiety which at the moment IS medicated until I can sort the underlying issues out and have less to be anxious about.

It's more a behavioural thing (although yes, influenced by a chemical imbalance) which I think would be better sorted with serotonin boosting supplements (if they work like some claim) and perhaps some form of psychotherapy, CBT etc. Understand that under normal circumstances it doesn't bother me one bit, its when I get to relationships that it f**ks things up for me because it causes OCD/Attachment issues, I'd never thought about it until recently but having done all the reading I have over the last few days on the topic, SO much makes sense as to why I ended up with certain people and why the relationships went the way they did.

For me antidepressants are a last resort because I MAY have to try a few before I found the right one and I have too much going on in life to be dealing with the potentially worse situation that adverse side effects may bring about.

Sertraline is said to be one of the best for OCD tendencies but as we've just seen, Scruff said 'f**k that' and Weige said 'It's awesome'.
WiegieboardIcon...10-08-2017 @ 23:31 
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I like that you have a healthy distrust of medicine and that you want to deal with your issues psychologically if you can.
I worked on a mixture of both and was very lucky that what I got worked for me. My brother has tried several meds that havent been all that wonderous for him but eventually found one that did work. It was a crutch that allowed some of the pressure off him, just enough to find ways to slowly change his thought tendancies and patterns.
Changing the mind is a slow slow process but a very rewarding one if you can work out what makes you happier.

For me, I had to avoid situations that made me feel aggressive and hyper vigilant. After a while of that, I could start working on not being triggered by mild forms of what got me riled up and over time I built up a change of mind where I didn't see these things as anything to be bothered about at all. I wont lie it took a few years for me to get to the point where I can view a bas***d as not a challenge to be stomped over but I got there and now I dont even see people like that as people. I just see them as something to be pointed at and laughed at.

Whatever bothers you, just take little steps of telling yourself it doesnt really matter. Even if you dont believe it, just keep saying it when the situation arises and eventually I bet you'll start to believe yourself.
BigMaccaIcon...10-08-2017 @ 23:57 
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I've not much advice to offer about coping with your issues, but before medicating, do some serious research on the links between serotonin levels and depression - it's far from as clear as we have been led to believe over the last 35 years or so from what I can gather
BillytheoldIcon...11-08-2017 @ 00:26 
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Had to walk through the ghetto with my wolf today. Pitt bulls/ city dogs loose everywhere. Someone stuck my tire. I bought a tire with graffiti gang sign on tread for a 20 spot. Add three peeps that followed me. It's gonna be alright my friend. Turn that page.
The_Lone_WolfIcon...11-08-2017 @ 04:14 
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Post Edited: 11.08.2017 @ 04:15 AM by The_Lone_Wolf
My missus went onto Sertraline at one point and it made her worse... Some said it would get better, but she couldn't handle it.

One of her mates was the same.

My older brother however loves it.

As you say we are all different.

I sometimes think that we are of the generation where we slipped through the net... I'm mid 30's, and when I was at school you was either marked as clever or stupid, or well behaved or naughty. Nobody to my knowledge had an ism, or any other kind of label.

Now days, it seems every kid has some type of label, or ism, or is on a scale of some type. My son is 10 and he has been given several tags or ism's etc... However in my eyes, he is just a boy who does and deals with things his own way. Yeah he gets f**ked off sometimes and smashes the s**t out of things, but he's a growing boy who is going through puberty. He hates busy places and places that are really noisy... And I can't blame him either.

My boy doesn't take any medication by the way.

I hate the term normal, because what the f**k is it? We are all different and we all deal with things in different ways.

I'm sure if I was a boy in this age, I'd have a load of ism's or labels put on me.

My point is, you're a f**king good egg mate, just like my boy, and we all have our own quirks and ways. We just need to find ways at times to deal with the things that bring us down.

I often feel drained, mentally exhausted, and for years I've had minimal drive and motivation to do anything other than eat, sleep and sex/wank. I'm lazy as f**k, and the older I get the worse it becomes. I'm currently under a lot of stress at work, hence why I'm up at 4am because I can't sleep due to my brain constantly thinking about work... So I know that it'as bad.
LaTutaIcon...11-08-2017 @ 12:39 
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Wow plenty of people with those issues on here.
Try to get the right medication.
JackRevansIcon...11-08-2017 @ 15:16 
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